The Bachelor Party Guest List

by James Purdy April 18, 2019

You are getting married, huh?

Congratulations!

I am very happy for you. But what you don't realize is that you are about to spend the next year or so of your life planning a wedding with your significant other.

Assuming you go the traditional route of a large American wedding, you are going to spend every waking moment of the next few months of your life scouring over wedding venues and sampling cakes.

I spent an entire Saturday afternoon prior to my wedding looking at chair covers. You'd be surprised how many chair covers there are and how many features they have. There are enough options to ruin your Saturday afternoon, that's for sure.

But, the one bright and shining star in a long list of dreadful planning events and discussions over table centerpieces is planning your bachelor party.

If one was to make a calendar of events leading up to the day you tie the knot, the bachelor party should be highlighted, circled in red, and written in the most permanent of markers you can find.

Now.

The bachelor party is not without its own stressors.

One of those stressors is deciding who to invite and coming up with the bachelor party guest list. Normally guys stay out of the drama but go ahead and neglect to invite someone who thought they should have been on the bachelor party guest list and you are for sure going to be the recipient of a rather passive aggressive Facebook comment.

So spend 5 minutes while you are watching Lifetime movies with your soon-to-be bride and put together a bachelor party guest list.

Fortunately for you, we have narrowed that list into this very easy to use guide.

Use this guide to your advantage. Scroll through your contacts and place people into the following categories.

Some housekeeping:

In no way am I saying you can't invite this person or that person. Who am I to assign your crew hard and fast rules? However, there are things to consider about inviting each of these types of guests and I want you to really think about it and do what works for you.

Also, keep in mind, these are applicable to traditional bachelor parties where the Groom invites guys only. I understand there are plenty of non-traditional weddings, bachelor parties, and groups of friends. Apply these as you see fit.

The Best Man

The Best Man is the most integral human being in the bachelor party world and the bachelor party guest list.

Why?

The Best Man is the one who plans it. The Best Man role, is usually the best friend of the Groom and by nature of that relationship, usually knows the bachelor in and out.

He, and only he, is thus usually pretty good at knowing what the bachelor wants to do for his bachelor party. So don't forget to invite him. In fact, include him in reading this and making the list. Give him the list and let him run with it.

Depending on your relationship, it may be him who reads this and helps you to decide who to invite.

The Groomsmen

These days, wedding parties are getting larger and larger.

The common scenario is that the bride keeps adding bridesmaids and now you have to scrape together every dude you ever met to keep it even. Or, you just can't decide between two guys on your Rugby team so you ask both.

Either way, you have to invite the groomsmen. Typically, these are the dudes you'd invite to any party anyway. They are your best mates and you picked them to be groomsmen for a reason. You have to invite them unless they fall into some of the other categories which will be listed below.

The Must-Haves

Everybody has truly great friends that they have known their entire life.

But, for one reason or another, they didn't make the wedding party cut. I have a friend who still brings up the fact that he wasn't in my wedding party every time I see him and I got married in 2012.

I still invited him to my bachelor party. I had 5 guys in my wedding party but I invited 30 to my bachelor party.

Invite your great friends that just didn't make the cut. Invite your boys from your beer league hockey team. Invite the guy you share cubicle walls with.

The Filler Guys

If you have a smaller wedding party and / or a smaller bachelor party guest list, find some filler guys.

You don't want to show up to Vegas with just one guy.

That's not really a Wolfpack unless you are my friend Alan.

If you need to, find some filler guys to add to the list so you can "roll deep" or whatever the kids say these days.

On NBC's "This Is Us" [Yes, I watch "This Is Us"], Toby brought "Filler Guys" so he wouldn't appear to be as much of a loser as he really is in front of his super successful Brothers-In-Law. If he can do it, you can too.

The Brother-In-Law (Optional)

I marked this as optional for a reason.

Unless you are really close with your bride's brother, I wouldn't invite him.

My wife doesn't have a brother so I didn't have this problem but no one wants to have to keep the dollar bills in the pocket because the B.I.L. is there.

The Father (Optional)

Again, if you and your dad are boys like that, by all means, invite the old man.

But if you aren't friends like that, and especially if your dad isn't a partier, leave pops at home.

The Father-In-Law (Optional)

I strongly suggest you do not invite your Father-In-Law.

Do Not Ever Invite These People

Do not invite the bride. And don't do one of those weak joint bachelor / bachelorette parties either. Be your own man.

Any females that you aren't really good friends with like other people's girlfriends or wives (buzz kill) (I can't believe I have to write this).

Anyone's mom. My friend invited his mom to his bachelor party. She's really cool but no one's mom should be that cool.